If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
