Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
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