i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Sober January is a disaster.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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