Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I lost the right to judge tonight
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
