Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize