I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
