Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
