Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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