I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
