I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
