At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
