oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
