Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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