the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize