I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize