in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
My vagina just recognized that song.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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