time to smoke my breakfast
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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