The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize