I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Randomize