I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize