how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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