I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Just invented taco cereal.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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