Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
