The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Randomize
