Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(708): View more from Illinois

you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend

(1-708): View more from Illinois

why?

(708): View more from Illinois

so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.

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(708): you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend (1-708): why? (708): so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement. http://tfl.nu/h2nt

Replies (163) Good night (3435) Bad night (1116)
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(630): View more from Illinois

why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?

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(630): why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt? http://tfl.nu/7oa6

Replies (97) Good night (643) Bad night (4115)
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(567): View more from Ohio

you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.

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(567): you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often. http://tfl.nu/8to5

Replies (6) Good night (3199) Bad night (641)
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(917): View more from New York City

I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina

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(917): I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina http://tfl.nu/sexo

Replies (71) Good night (6658) Bad night (828)
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(970): View more from Colorado

ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"

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(970): ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and" http://tfl.nu/hqw1

Replies (20) Good night (6357) Bad night (937)
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(913): View more from Kansas

high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?

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(913): high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life? http://tfl.nu/lv3r

Replies (10) Good night (3639) Bad night (895)
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(913): View more from Kansas

did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.

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(913): did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box. http://tfl.nu/h01u

Replies (10) Good night (3096) Bad night (1494)
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(530): View more from California

You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.

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(530): You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her. http://tfl.nu/7jba

Replies (6) Good night (3917) Bad night (654)
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(705): View more from Ontario

You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work

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(705): You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work http://tfl.nu/80dk

Replies (5) Good night (1990) Bad night (660)
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(817): View more from Texas

I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.

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(817): I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox. http://tfl.nu/4k53

Replies (4) Good night (1130) Bad night (487)
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(440): View more from Ohio

Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.

(1-440): View more from Ohio

That's better than I've done so far.

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(440): Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today. (1-440): That's better than I've done so far. http://tfl.nu/4hrm

Replies (0) Good night (1063) Bad night (449)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.

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(715): She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird. http://tfl.nu/gla6

Replies (8) Good night (1303) Bad night (577)
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(650): View more from California

That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.

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(650): That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands. http://tfl.nu/y7oo

Replies (2) Good night (252) Bad night (993)
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(513): View more from Ohio

You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.

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(513): You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when. http://tfl.nu/o3c9

Replies (6) Good night (1232) Bad night (255)
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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar

(1-780): View more from Alberta, CA

To be fair I was thirsty

(780): View more from Alberta, CA

When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"

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(780): You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar (1-780): To be fair I was thirsty (780): When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!" http://tfl.nu/ztbw

Replies (1) Good night (640) Bad night (217)

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