Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Randomize
