my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
