I faked an abortion last night.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize