i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
