i was rollin on her like bob the builder
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
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