This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
