The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I am one with the molecules
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
