he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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