Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
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After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
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I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT