Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
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