and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
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Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
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Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I love you. Go after that dick
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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