pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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