Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
How does one acquire holy water?
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
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