jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
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