i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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