Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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