Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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