A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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