Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Randomize
