Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
