pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
