I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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