Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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