3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
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