she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Randomize
