I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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