I want to have your abortion
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
He? As in you personified your dick?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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