Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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